The Impact of Community: When ‘Less’ Results In So Much ‘More’

Last week I posted about feeling so low that I had no more-in-me. I was sick. My dog Zoey is sick. “How would I make it through the day?” I wanted to share my experience of feeling at the lowest of lows rather than my usual optimism and accomplishment. Being sick for an extended period of time helped me appreciate how other women might be feeling if they’ve been ill for a number of months or inactive for any reason for a period of time. In these situations, the thought of being active or athletic can be daunting. I get it now. I started feeling overwhelmed and unsure about how I could ever get back to my regular activities.

Feeling fragile from pneumonia this winter and getting sick again, I noticed I began asking myself fragile questions. “Will I ever get back to 100%? Will I be able to resume to my usual routines and training? Am I too old?” The last question was disheartening. I am proud of staying fit and able as I get older. In a couple weeks I turn 59. It sounds old. Yet my spirit is young. My confidence in my ability to do more increases as I get older. Nevertheless, I wondered, “Have I reached my max? Is it possible I don’t have any more?”

I hesitated posting the blog article because I was afraid other people would be asking the same questions and thinking the same thoughts. “She has to slow down. She’s getting old. Being sick is a sign to back off and ‘act her age’.” My saboteur can be quite nasty. But I posted the blog anyway because my goal was to share the experience of ‘less-in-me’ and make it ok. Despite my troublesome inner critic. 

What happened after posting the blog caught me by surprise. An outpouring of love and caring. I felt heard. Validated. Encouraged. Supported. An astounding experience. While people cautioned me to take it easy and take time to heal, no one told me to back off or change my goals and lifestyle. You appreciated my honesty. You told me it was ok to feel like crap. You told me to take the time to recharge to be even stronger. You called me courageous. One woman told me I was her woman hero! Wow. 

To Each of Us From All Of Us:

As a way to extend the caring and support full circle, I offer back to you some of your words of encouragement for when you are going through a rough time. Or just need a little lovin’. To remind you, you’ve always got more. We've always got more. 

From you to me to you: 

• Sending you the biggest of hugs and love. As someone who always feels like they can push through and get to the finish line as well, I have learned over these last couple years that the times we don’t have more in us are the times when we realize we have more around us.
• Life can’t have the ups without the downs. You will recover and feel all of that positivity and optimism again before you know it. In the meantime, weep away.
• You wrote so clearly and simply about what each person may experience – our ups and downs. When we are down, we feel beaten. But this does not mean that there is nothing else in us. We just need time to regroup. Take off all unnecessary obligations, including towards yourself. Give yourself time to rest and adapt.
• I admire your courage & strength. I believe you help heal yourself & others in vocalizing not only your ups but your downs. Sending you hugs!
• What a great heartfelt message. So many challenges at one time…u are entitled to crash and be vulnerable … because know what? It will pass and u will rise up again. Sometimes life throws us curve balls….it sucks. Take time to heal…be good to yourself …be patient.
• Life can sure challenge us emotionally and physically. Be the honest and true person to you and allow yourself to heal my friend.
• One day at a time. Don’t look back, just one day at a time. It is within the struggles that you get to know your strength.
• Chin up my friend…. keep doing what you’re doing. Live life hard.
• Whatever you are going through, remember it is just temporary.  Sometimes things happen to turn you into a beautiful diamond. Best wishes. Keep moving forward! I believe in you.
• Hold on! A good reminder to be kind to ourselves through difficult times.
• It’s always darkest before the dawn. Take it one day at a time and do what you need to to cope, not what you think you should do.
• You’ll be back and you’ll have more in you! We all need to feel like crap sometime and have difficult months!
• Take the time you need to listen and remember to believe and listen to the “wee small voice” that is speaking only to you.  Heal, energetically and the physical will follow.
• I know the feeling of losing the More-in-Me feeling, and although I have not been sick, I have been climbing out of a self inflicted burnout. Acknowledging the healing needed both physically & mentally is in my eyes a More-in-Me activity.
• All very overwhelming so please be kind to yourself. Definitely ok to have our less-in-me moments. Recharge to be even stronger. Thinking of you.
• It’s okay to be in a less of me state sometimes. Take all the time you need to heal from these setbacks physically and emotionally. Be kind to yourself.
• When I had a run of illness, I started to get fed up with myself and think it would never end. It does and good for you to recognize this is now, not necessarily tomorrow.
• Sending you lots of healing vibes. You will get through this! xo
• Just know that it’s ok to be feeling what you are feeling. Be gentle with yourself.
• You are so such a good ray of light for the world and you really make it a better place!
• Rest is good and getting back out will be sweet when you’re ready. 
• I know you’ll keep moving forward! My woman hero! I bet you didn’t know! (I didn’t! )

And lots of love with many, many hugs, hearts and well wishes for Zoey. (Who says ‘wag-wag’ by the way! She’s doing really well right now. Enjoying the moments…and her treats!)

I Took Your Advice! 

One week later and what a difference – mentally, emotionally and physically. I took your advice to take care of me which resulted in a quick trip to North Carolina. I knew the warm, sunny weather would improve my disposition and shift my mood. I ran a little. I rode a little. I yoga’d a little. I read a little. I wrote a little. And I napped. 

I’m home happier and healthier in body and spirit. In my journal last week I wrote, “I am choosing my attitude. I am strong, wise and willing.”  And planning my big adventure for the fall. ‘More’ to come! 

Celebrating Woman Heroes

Thank you to all the woman heroes who support each other in this way every day. 

What is your favourite woman hero story? How did she help you find your ‘more’? Please share in the comments below. Let’s celebrate each other.